Review: United States of Tara, Season 3, Ep 311 “Crunchy Ice”

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Airdate: Monday, June 13, 2011 10:30PM E/P

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Review: United States of Tara, Season 3, Ep 311 "Crunchy Ice" 1

Marshall (Keir Gilchrist, R) takes refuge at his grandma Sandy's (Frances Conroy, L) while coping with the loss of Lionel and family issues.

“Crunchy Ice” is one of my favorite episodes this season. As it opens with a montage of Marshall (Keir Gilchrist) and his grandmother Sandy (guest star Frances Conroy ) in the Christmas room; Kate (Brie Larson) having breakfast with Evan (Keir O’Donnell) and his son Monty; Charmaine (Rosemarie DeWitt) and Neil (Patton Oswalt) sipping coffee; and then Max (John Corbett) walking past Marshall’s old room now occupied by the menacing Bryce (Toni Collette), it’s paralleling how everyone is enjoying some normalcy while Max endures the chaos alone. The sign on Bryce’s door is absurdly humorous: “And The Lord Said EAT ME – Matthew 26:26.” Ok, I’m not versed in the scriptures but if they have anything remotely similar, sign me up for bible study!

As Tara (Toni Collette) is still MIA, some of the alters– Buck, T, and Alice – make brief appearances. My favorite is Buck hiding behind the kitchen counter while Max searches in the fridge.

Buck: “Psst. Hey, Maxaroo, gimme one of them beers, would ya?”

Max: “Buck?”

Buck: “Hell yeah, I ain’t got much time. Well, get a cold one from the back for Christ’s sake would ya, this is my last Goddamn meal!”

Max: “What the fu*k are you doing?”

Buck: “I’m saying goodbye, hombre. (Max comes over with the beer) Just put it on the counter there.”

Max: “What do you mean goodbye?”

Buck: “We got a ‘Nam situation in the medulla oblongata, here. People trying to get out but there ain’t no choppers and that fu*ker Bryce is picking us off one by one. Well, I ain’t taking no dirt nap without a final beer!”

Max: “I wanna talk to Tara.”

Buck: “Huh, good luck. If you see her, tell her I tried my best. Oh and please tell Char, even though it never worked out between us, I still think about her.”

Max: “I will. I guess. (shaking his head) Let me just…”

Buck: “Oh shit! Here he comes. Listen, my ashes are to be mixed with a fifth of Jack Daniels and poured onto the grave of Mr. John Wayne, Pacificview Memorial Park, Bayview Terrace, section 575, you got it?”

Max: “Ash…what ashes?”

Review: United States of Tara, Season 3, Ep 311 "Crunchy Ice" 2

Grandma Sandy (Frances Conroy) shares some fruit cake from 1973 with her grandson Marshall (Keir Gilchrist)

I hate to admit it, but Charmaine may be right about putting Tara into a facility “where she can get the kind of professional help she really needs.”Even Marshall and Kate are on board. As Max collects more of Buck’s arsenal in the basement, the family gathers, including grandma Sandy, and Bryce, who flirts with Kate in the most sleezy way. He makes vulgar comments like “jizz sock” and asks Marshall if he’s still “chugging cock.” I love the writers for being so ballsy.

Max’s idea of taking Tara and the family to some of her favorite places in hopes she’ll come back doesn’t go so well. Grandma Sandy points out the oddities of his wife’s behavior to Max, at the museum, “Your wife is humping that sculpture.” Sandy even encourages Max to leave Tara just like his father left her. Harsh. And I’m not sure how Bryce uses the urinal in the men’s room between Max and Neil; it’s still Tara’s body after all. A very confused Neil asks, “So, does your wife have a dick now?”

Neil discovers Bryce’s obituary in one of Buck’s porn magazines, prompting Max, Charmaine, and Neil to take Bryce to the grave site to prove he’s dead. Bryce refuses to believe it. Neil must escort a viciously spitting, cursing Charmaine away while Max tries to break through to Tara to no avail. Bryce’s words to Max disturb me beyond words. “You know, she’s not so fu*king innocent, Max”… She wanted it to happen, Max. Ever think of that? That’s why she never told.”

Review: United States of Tara, Season 3, Ep 311 "Crunchy Ice" 3

Max (John Corbett) pins Bryce (Toni Collette) to the wall after an altercation with Marshall.

Things continue to escalate at home when Marshall and Bryce get into a physical altercation. After Max pulls Bryce off, Tara finally reemerges, tearful and remorseful for hurting Marshall and everyone around her. I wonder if she was able to see what Bryce was doing but unable to pull out of his grasp. It seems when she physically hurts someone, she snaps out of her altered state. Remember when T hit Kate, Tara came rushing back. Driving to the treatment center, Tara asks Max to stop for a moment. She kisses him, expressing her love “in sickness and in health,” then she jumps out of the truck and over the bridge!

It’s a travesty Tara and the gang won’t return for season four. Collette brilliantly slips into each character so convincingly; I’m astounded at her ability to do it so effortlessly. Her whole demeanor changes, from her posture to the emotion in her eyes – she’s got mad skills! She deserves an Emmy nod!

Tune into the season/series finale next Monday, June 20th at 10:30PM E/P only on Showtime.

Photos © Showtime, All Rights Reserved.

Review: United States of Tara, Season 3, Ep 311 "Crunchy Ice" 4

Judy Manning

Dream chaser extraordinaire! Judy tends to be a tad sarcastic and kind of goofy! She is an avid admirer of all things supernatural, paranormal, celestial and mystical. She loves to read, write, and watches way too much TV. She enjoys many genres of film and music (and let's be honest, most music from the 80s). She also has a wicked sweet tooth. Cupcakes beware.
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