Airdate: Sunday, July 10, 2011
Rating:
“Holidazed and Confused” is a rather tame episode, at least by The Real Housewives of New Jersey standard. In fact, there’s no real drama at all; something I haven’t seen in a very long time!
Are Melissa’s dreams of becoming a recording artist actually going to come true? When Joey G’s attorney, James Leonard, brings marketing specialist Mida Leacock with him to hear Melissa sing, she in turn brings recording producer K-Mack and singer/songwriter Corté Ellis, both with Soul Diggaz, to judge Melissa’s talents. This is a big deal for Melissa, and rightfully so, as Soul Diggaz has worked with mega talent like Britney Spears and Beyoncé. To my surprise and theirs, Melissa knocks it out of the park with the song her songwriter, Antony Bitar, wrote for her! It’s a very catchy tune and one I think could actually make Top 40! Color me surprised! But when macho man Joey G hears Melissa has to work 15 hours a day in the studio if she wants to be successful, in typical Guido fashion, he becomes concerned about who’s going to take care of the kids and the house. So imagine my bewilderment when, instead of telling her no way, he decides to build a studio in the basement of the house. This is the first redeeming quality I’ve seen in Joey G. I can’t wait to see how the studio turns out – Melissa isn’t the only one who thinks her booth is too small.
Jacqueline and Chris decorating the tree
That’s some sexy outfit Teresa dons for the special dinner Joe makes her. “You want some of this?” she quips as Joe checks her out. Obviously, she’s no slouch in the sexy department. While the Giudices have been able to buy a beautiful home, they haven’t been able to furnish it yet, at least not the living room. So Joe sets up a picnic-like setting on the floor for them to eat and reaffirm their love for each other during the terrible times they’re going through. Some people, given a bankruptcy and court cases, would break up. It’s actually very touching to see how sweet they are together.
Kathy and Rich are still searching for a restaurant to buy. When she finds one she likes however, Rich seems to get a little nervous when Kathy gushes over the place. Is Rich concerned about the cost or trying to refrain from showing is excitement? When they seek advice from Albert Manzo about running a restaurant, they are initially greeted with a very hearty laugh which made me laugh too. But, I love Albert’s honesty. He tells them they’ll miss weddings and other events in order to make their restaurant a success, but then relates a story about a friend who passed on 9/11 and the joy Albert received at the funeral knowing what a huge part the Brownstone played in the man’s life. His best advice? “Forget the restaurant for a while. You let her go into catering like she wanted to. Dip your foot into the pond first. Don’t just jump in and you should be fine.” Finally, someone talks some sense into Rich!
A happy Ashley for a change
Lauren feels left out since her brothers moved into their own place and Greg has become their roomie. The three of them always had a close relationship and Lauren is missing that. Jacqueline accompanies Lauren as they bring food over to the boys’ apartment but Lauren, unable to control her emotions, begins to cry and finally tells her brothers how she feels. To console her, Chris and Albie give her a key of her own to their apartment, with a caveat to call before coming over. But later, when she and Caroline visit the guys to help decorate for Christmas (can you believe that green feather Christmas tree?!), Lauren has her own pity party because the guys didn’t invite her over when they were cooking up a feast for dinner. Geez, Lauren, grow up already! Get a life! Even Caroline agrees. “I think you’re being unreasonable. You would think she was the poor, loneliest thing with no life and no friends, nothing going on – she sits up in her room like, ‘nobody loves me.’… They moved. Your life changed. Their lives changed.” Some good, old-fashioned Caroline advice. Ya gotta love this woman!
Everyone’s favorite housewife-who-isn’t-a-housewife, Kim G, invites Jacqueline over to catch up and show off her home. Kim and Jacqueline have been friends of a sort for quite a while. After not seeing each other since the Posche Fashion show, where Kim sat with Melissa and company rather than Jacqueline, things get a little touchy when Kim begins reading from an article about what happened in court between Teresa and Monica. Kim loves to hate on Teresa. By the way, Monica is the wife of Joe’s ex-partner’s lawyer. Wow! That was a mouthful! Anyway, cheers to Jacqueline for telling Kim to mind her own business! Whatever Teresa and Joe are going through with the bankruptcy and the trial (the ex-partner is suing Joe) is their business, not hers and certainly not Kim’s. Kim may be one of the most fame-hungry persons I know! With that said, I was surprised to hear Kim had undergone surgery for a brain tumor, as was Jacqueline. Come on! Who doesn’t tell their close friend they had surgery to remove a brain tumor. Skeptical as ever, I did a little research on the internet and surprise, surprise! I couldn’t come up with one single article about Kim having a brain tumor. I would think that would have been big news in the RHONJ world. Whatever…
Jacqueline is nervous on the day of her holiday party because it’s the first time the Giudices and Gorgas will be together since the so-called makeup talks they had. The Manzos arrive first, followed by the Giudices. Jacqueline pulls Teresa to the side inquiring about what happened in court with Monica. Teresa tells Jacqueline it was no big deal. “I saw her in court and I said to her, ‘Are you Monica Chacon?’ She said yes. I said, ‘Monica, instead of worrying about me, worry about yourself.’ And then I walked away.” I about bust a gut listening to Joe’s take on the situation. Talking to the Manzo men, he recounts his version. “She’s f*ckin nuts, my wife. We’re in court this morning, and she like, goes up to this lawyer, Monica Chacon, and literally just starts goin off on her. Like crazy…I said ‘Tre, you’re gonna get arrested’ and I literally pulled her away. She’s nuts. She’s really f*ckin nuts.” Too funny!
Joey dressed in Jacqueline's outfit - he really is a good sport!
I want to take a minute here to slap Ashley upside the head. Once again, she comes down on her mom; this time for trying to help Teresa and Joey G reconcile. Personally, I think inviting the Gorgas to their holiday dinner is a nice thing. But Ashley insists Jacqueline only invited them so she could be involved in whatever drama there might be. “Anywhere there’s drama, she tries to put herself in it, no matter what it is. It’s like, come on, she was friends with Danielle [Staub] for a reason.” I really don’t understand what Ashley’s problem with her mom is about. As far as I can tell, Jacqueline has been nothing but loving and supportive. Ashley is a brat who always wants things her way.
Thankfully, there’s no drama at dinner – everyone seems to be getting along just fine, joking and kidding around despite Teresa’s stupid comments bringing up the past. Melissa foolishly says, “One thing I have to tell you, don’t dare my husband to do anything, because he’ll do it.” What a red flag! Needless to say, one of the Manzo boys, with encouragement from Caroline, dares Joey to put on what Jacqueline is wearing. And he does! From there, the party becomes a happy, joyous event with everyone getting along really well. So well, Melissa invites everyone to the Christmas party she and Joey are having next week. But Teresa doesn’t seem all too happy about it. I know she says she doesn’t mind sharing her friends with Melissa and Joey, but I don’t think she really means it. Teresa is one jealous bitch in my opinion. And therein lies the problem.
Tune in to The Real Housewives of New Jersey next Sunday, July 18 at 10 pm ET/PT for “Twas the Fight Before Christmas” when all hells break loose.
All photos © 2011 Bravo. All rights reserved.
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Linda
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